- 1 year ago
- 1 year ago
Making the move to Swing Clubs
Making the jump from swinging with friends, swinging with new friends met on social networks, or swinging with virtual strangers met on swinger web sites, to visiting a swing club is indeed a big jump. Look before you make the leap. Moving from a simple one on one couple swap to a larger group setting with completely different dynamics, and a set of rules meant to insure safety, is a big step. You need to ask many questions. Are you both ready to take this step? Do you both want more from the lifestyle? Are you ,as a couple, ready for a club? Are the two of you on the same page? Have you talked through all possible situations, and how you would handle them as a couple? Are you familiar with the club rules and willing to abide by them? Are you ready for public sex acts ? Group sex ? Orgies ? Naked people everywhere? Single females? Single males? Dirty dancing? Sexy games? This article will help you sort it all out by covering the basics of club life, and give you the information needed to decide if the club environment is right for both of you.
A swinger club is a sexual playground. It is a special place where anything sexual can, and usually does,happen. Not all clubs are alike. Just as all couples are not all alike. Clubs vary in size, amenities, ambiance , and atmosphere. Some are basic, Some are lavish. Most fall in between. Where one just doesn’t feel right to the two of you, another may feel like home the moment the two of you walk in. That feeling of being welcome, being comfortable, being accepted out weights the frills other clubs may offer. Look for the club that is the perfect sensual and sexual match for both of you. Most clubs don’t venture into the worlds of Fetish and BDSM . The majority of clubs are centered on swapping, group sex, and exhibitionism/voyeurism. This article will deal with clubs that are ‘on premise’, and feature both private and public areas for sexual pleasure.
As a couple new to the club scene there is a very real need to thoroughly discuss the realities of the swing club environment. Sex is going to be out in the open. You can, to a degree, choose your level of exposure to the public sex, But there is no way to be at a club and not see public sex acts. Remember, “Swing club” is a polite way of saying “Sex club”. This means that both of you need to be comfortable in this sexually charged atmosphere.
No club will make you participate. You are totally free to move at your own pace, and to do only what the two of you are comfortable doing. Participation is never mandatory. This is a cardinal rule of virtually every club. But, if you , or your partner simply can not deal with seeing public sex acts and naked people breathing heavily, now is the time to rethink visiting a club.
Most clubs have rules regarding single males and single females. Sexist as it is, the community welcomes single females and limits or refuses single males. You will encounter single males and single females in a club. Whether the club allows single males or not. There are a good number of couples that allow hall passes. That is that one or both members of the couple are free to play as they wish and with whoever they want. You need to accept that males, females, and couples will approach you. Knowing in advance what is right for you both is key. Are single females acceptable? Are single males? Are you looking for a couple your first time at a club? Public play? Private play? You need to be able to say no with ease and comfort. Another main rule of all clubs is - No, means no. More importantly not to be upset with a no. It simply means that someone is not a match at that moment. Be prepared to follow the rules.
Clubs are set up for a wide range of preferences. They have public and private areas. They have group areas and couple only areas. Single males are restricted from certain areas of the clubs. Only the two of you know what you want to experience and what you are ready to do. But you need to talk it out before you go and while you are there. What you think is ok as a fantasy might not be so great as a reality. At the same time things you think you wouldn’t want to do when you see it live might just be the thing you want to do most. Keep talking to each other before, during, and after a club experience. Remember it’s about you two as a couple and enhancing your relationship. Not damaging it.
Most clubs have rules regarding single males and single females. Sexist as it may seem, the swinging community welcomes single females, while limiting or excluding single males.However, you and your partner will encounter single males and single females at most clubs. Many couples give each other a “Hall Pass”. This allows the couple to play (aka have sex) as singles. The two of you will be approached by not just couples, …
but also single females, and single males. You need to discuss these situations, and agree how they will be handled before you are confronted by them. Other important questions need to be addressed before hand as well. Will you play in a private room or a public room? Play in the same room or separate rooms? One on one or group sex? Condoms or bareback? Oral or no oral? Anal? Working things out in advance is essential. Arguments are ugly and end with the two of you being asked to leave and in some cases asked not to come back. Swingers need to be able to say ‘no thank you’ with both ease and comfort. The cardinal rule of swinging is NO MEANS NO. If someone tells you No thank you, accept it and move on. Don’t get upset. No usually means its not a good match at that moment. Getting upset will get both of you shown the door. NO MEANS NO. Learn the rules of the club, and the etiquette of swinging. Set rules that both of you can live with, and stick to them.
When it comes to a club visit expect that first visit to be one of exploration and learning. Get a feel for the dynamics of the club and its members. Remember it is a new experience for the both of you, and at times can be overwhelming and even intimidating.This is a different and diverse world with its own set of rules. When deciding if you are ready for a club you need to take all the different possibilities into consideration. You need to determine what you are looking for, and what both of you are really ready to experience. Clubs are a highly charged, exciting sexual environment.They offer endless ways of exploring your sexuality. But be sure that both of you are ready to explore that part of the lifestyle. A club is also a place to meet some new really nice like-minded people. The kind of people that could become long term friends. As for a word of advice - on my first visit to a club a long time member came up to me and said “the best thing is to learn to walk before you run”.He was right. It was true, and was the best advice I have ever gotten at a club.
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